The character creation screen was simple enough and had a nice array of customizable options. I'm the type of person who will spend half an hour on my character's looks, but it didn't take me more than six minutes to lock in what I wanted and I was very happy with the results. My power hungry conjurer, Safia Minchew.
We start out on a wagon ride with a pair of mute twins, some happy floating anime creatures and a creepy hard-drinking dude who rambles on excessively about game lore. I used to care about game lore. I understand why it's there. But I couldn't hit the dialog progression fast enough to get him to stop.
(Do I look bored to death here? Perhaps because my character was mimic'ing my real life face.)
We ride on and on...and on...and...on...and he talks...and talks...and...talks and I click and click...and click. We are suddenly ambushed by bow wielding dudes who unfortunately just miss him with an arrow. Finally, we arrive at the city gates, where I practically fling myself off the wagon. While he continues to blather on, I sprint away, eager to start my adventures in Gridania (which sounded to me like a made up word in the vain of Vandelay Industries...) But no mind...we're here!
Vast, lush, welcoming me in to the FFXIV world...and then....the first fellow adventurer I see... is named Veigar Yordle.
(*For the reader who doesn't get this..it's a character from League of Legends..the amazing game I play rather obsessively when I'm not riding..forever..on wagons...with drunk guys.) I follow the masses into the first building I find and Lo....this Captain Janeway-looking bitch has a quest for me. She ALSO has a mile of dialog I must click through..but that's okay...I have a quest..I'm ready. Let's kill things!
I follow Veigar up a path..ready to start swinging my mace of doom and destroying tiny creatures in flashes of great magic!
But first, I must attune at a sphere of something or other...
And actively pursue green check marks on the map.
And hang with the Rosenkrunz's
And deliver something to this dude...
And these people here..
And this guy..
You people ever hear of UPS?
Oh Hey..I'm at the Conjurer's Guild!
(Dude..standing right on top of the satellite dish...THIS is why we can't have nice things.)
An hour later...and I am finally standing outside with things to kill!!!!!
And LO...I DING!
And go back to town.
And I get some new armor!
And the server goes down.